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Fantasy Football

Welcome to my Fantasy Football world!

If you've been faithfully watching all the football games this season, you will have noticed a problem in the game.  The football is dropped too many times. I attribute that problem to the fact that the football is brown. Come on...brown? Half the time I can't see where the quarterback threw the ball, much less who caught it.

And then you have 20 guys heaped in a pile on top of the ball, or at least where they think the ball might be. Apparently they can't find it either. Solution? PINK FOOTBALL! No more fumbling around trying to see the ball, much less catch it - with the pink football the game becomes visible for the players and the fans.

And now for an even bigger problem - the catch. The ball seems to keep slip-sliding away. Why don't they let the guys use baseball mitts? It's much easier to catch the ball with a nice big mitt...

Or how about they give the players spiked gloves? Hey, they could use a little help here. If they won't make the football pink, the least they can do is add a little 'spike' to the game!

Or what about this - make the football with Velcro, and give the receivers Velcro gloves! If they all had a little Velcro in their gloves, they wouldn't be dropping the ball so much. should be mentioned that it would NOT be good to put Velcro in the quarterback's gloves...
And if the sports pros won't do that, then how about giving the guys some style in their gloves? Maybe they won't catch the ball any better, but at least this would put some finesse in the game. (Sure, you don't catch the ball, but you sure look good trying!)

Something else to consider - the helmet. It doesn't seem to offer much protection, what with the opposing team always grabbing at it. How about a spiked hair-do? If their hands can't catch the ball, maybe their hair could?

Another option to consider in the improvement of the game - the shoes. Say a 400 pound player is approaching you...he's not taking you down in these shoes! You'll stay put, even if a 500 mile-an-hour tornado comes whipping down the field.

And last but not's a great idea to 'beef' up the game - demand that every player puts on 500 pounds. I don't know about you, but I'd run silly if I saw this coming toward me...

But let's face it - some guys can only eat so many Twinkies. So how about giving the players their own sumo wresting suits? We all worry when we see a player go down, and 50 guys jump on top of him. With these protective suits, we could just keep laughing and drinking our beer!

P.S. Steve from Polar Ball just let me know about this cool game that he invented. Polar Ball is played with Velcro gloves and a Velcro ball. This sounds very cool! Here's some info:

Norky's most favorite game at the North Pole is NORKY POLAR BALL®. It builds motor skills and eye/hand coordination and helps with self-esteem. Recommended by parents and doctors, physical rehab and occupational therapists and P.E. teachers. POLAR BALL was created by Steve Allgeier and also received a US patent and is loved by the special needs industry. You can check out this awesome game at 

I think someone ought to let the Green Bay Packers know about this, what do you think?